Posts Tagged "the face of heaven so fine"

Podcast #2: “The Face of Heaven So Fine” by Kat Howard

by on Aug 6, 2013 in Podcast | 0 comments

Apex Magazine is pleased to present “The Face of Heaven So Fine” by Kat Howard in our second podcast episode. Narrated by Lynne M. Thomas and produced by Erika Ensign. Download Podcast #2 (“The Face of Heaven So Fine” by Kat Howard) or listen using the player below. (5:46 seconds in...

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The Face of Heaven So Fine

by on Feb 5, 2013 in Short Fiction | 5 comments

by Kat Howard   There is an entire history in the stars. Light takes time to travel, to get from wherever the star is to wherever we can see it, here, on Earth. So when you think about it, when we see the stars, we are looking back in time. Everything those stars actually shone on has already happened. But just because a story already happened, that doesn’t mean it’s finished. **** Juliet was the bleeding heart of a story, made flesh and made gorgeous. She was all eyeliner and fishnets, the kind of girl who looked like she’d carve designs on her own skin, not because she was trying to hurt herself, but just for the beauty of it, you know? It wasn’t ever herself that Juliet cut, though. It was her lovers. All of them. That was the deal. A fuck, and then a perfect star, cut out of their skin. The scars were like a badge of honor. Proof you’d been with her. People would ask her to put them some place visible, those little stars she cut out of people, but Juliet chose. Juliet always chose. I fell in love with Juliet the first time I met her, which doesn’t make me any different from anyone else. I know that. That’s just how it was with Juliet. If you fell in love with her, it was an instant, headlong crash. I don’t think she fell in love back. It didn’t matter. She was like a star–so bright that everything else seemed dim when she walked into the room. It was enough to be in her orbit. I met her for the first time at a party. I knew who she was. Everyone knew who Juliet was. She was a love story with a knife, and a tattoo of an apothecary’s vial. But when we met, I was dancing, and some guy bumped into me, and I tripped. When I put my hands out to catch myself, it was her shoulders that they landed on. She leaned close, her lips almost brushing my ear, “You’re Rose, right?” I nodded. “Let’s dance.” We did. We danced until I could taste her sweat mixed with mine, until I wasn’t sure whether the ache in my thighs was from exhaustion or desire. We danced until I saw stars, her hand under my shirt, tracing a constellation on my skin. **** Because of the distances between the stars and the Earth, some of the stars we see in the sky have already died, burnt themselves out. Some people think that’s sad, that we look up and see things that aren’t there anymore. I think it’s beautiful. It’s like, because we can still see them, in a way they’re still alive. **** After, when her fingers were still inside me, her head resting on my chest, I asked: “What do you do with the stars?” Juliet was silent long enough that I thought she wasn’t going to answer. Then she said, “There was a boy, and I loved him. It was the kind of love people write poetry and songs about. “He burned brighter than the stars, and then he died. And I didn’t. I thought I would, but I didn’t.” She climbed from the bed, and looked out the window. “I promised I would cut him out, and hang him in the heavens. That way, everyone can see him, and when they do, they’ll know he was worth everything.” **** Juliet cut the star from the skin on my chest, right over my heart. She used a dagger. “It was his,” she said when I asked. It hurt. Of course it hurt. The star of skin was the least of what she was cutting out of me. I had never wondered before how it was that people fell out of love with Juliet. The scar healed cleanly. Not just cleanly, but perfectly, a star shining on my skin. **** I look for him in the sky. That boy that Juliet loved so much that she would change the face of...

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